l*j
发帖数: 336 | 1 A husband is at home watching a football game when his wife interrupts,
"Honey, could you fix the light in the hallway? It's been flickering for
weeks now."
He looks at her and says angrily, "Fix the light? now? Does it look like
I have a G.E. logo printed on my forehead? I don't think so.
"Well then, could you fix the fridge door? It won't close right." To which
he replied, "Fix the fridge door? Does it look like I have Westinghouse
written on my forehead? I don't think so."
"Fine," she says, " |
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l***g
发帖数: 14 | 2 I was a flight stewardess before. I still remember on Indian flight.
On that flight, I met an Indian passenger. He didn’t speak English
but he was always polite. To make him understand, I tried to speak as
simply as I could. Once, he stopped me and asked me for a whiskey.
“Do you want whiskey on the rocks?” I asked him.
To my big surprise, after hearing my question, he suddenly banged his
hand on the table and said angrily: “No, I want whiskey on my table!
” |
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w*****g
发帖数: 16352 | 3 附送童话
Bye-bye, Bao Bao: Imagining the day one of our giant pandas leaves us
By John Kelly
October 23, 2016 at 6:46 PM
Mei Xiang and cub Bao Bao in April 2014. The giant panda offspring will head
to China next year. (Smithsonian National Zoo via Associated Press)
Giant panda Bao Bao will depart the Smithsonian’s National Zoo for China in
late winter, within the first few months of 2017.
— News release from the Smithsonian
“Mom, I don’t wanna go!”
Bao Bao stamped her foot petulantly, the very model... 阅读全帖 |
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z**********e
发帖数: 22064 | 4 https://zh.m.wikipedia.org/zh-cn/%E8%86%9C%E8%9B%A4%E6%96%87%E5%8C%96
膜蛤文化是中国大陆网友对中国共产党第三代领导核心、前中共中央总书记江泽民的一
些言行举止进行模仿的网络迷因。
江泽民部分夸张的表情被当作膜蛤表情包
膜蛤文化是中国大陆网友对中国共产党第三代领导核心、前中共中央总书记江泽民的一
些言行举止进行模仿的网络迷因，“膜”字取“膜拜”之意，而“蛤”则源自于认为江
泽民貌似蛤蟆的观点[1]。
“膜蛤”的网友被称或自称为“蛤丝”（“丝”即“粉丝”）、“膜法师”等，他们对
江泽民的许多言行进行模仿，并称其为“膜法”。“续一秒”（或“+1s”）是常被这
一群体在各种网络场合下使用的恶搞短语之一，意在祝福江泽民长寿或调侃其寿命长（
其中“续”指“续命”，来源于网友对重庆红衣男孩事件的解读）。
此风潮在中国大陆网络的传播以江泽民怒斥香港记者张宝华事件为起点，在2014年香港
等地出现抗议行为后开始盛行[1]。江泽民执政时沿袭邓小平的改革开放政策，理政上
海时保持海派精神，因此引起许多民众怀念其当政时经济发展迅速、房价物价... 阅读全帖 |
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s****r
发帖数: 5546 | 5 http://www.cracked.com/article/226_6-adorable-cat-behaviors-with-shockingly-evil-explanations/
One comment was about a cool cat:
In the area of Meowing, I had a cat who did more than subtle hints. My cat
Tiger, whom I had for 17 years, was adept enough at mimicking the human
voice that he could say certain one-syllable words relating to context, such
as "out", "meat", "ham", and "NOW (Said angrily)". During the last 5 years
of his life, he was able to do this. Our new cat, Neko, is pretty
unimpr |
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p********f
发帖数: 5148 | 6 hahaha.
In our house, Peipei always starts with good intentions. Then the licking becomes to rough to handle. The mutual grooming sessions always end up with Cocoa hissing at him angrily. |
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m****a
发帖数: 9485 | 7 http://www.mormonconverts.com/Jewish/This-Stuff-Is-Too-Brillian
Former Member Of Jewish Faith--conversion story
By Richard Cohen
I grew up Jewish. My family was not observant religiously, in fact, my
parents didn't even believe in God. But I did; until the day after my father
suddenly died.
I was just turning thirteen, and I stood in my room and angrily said out
loud, "There couldn't be a God if he would do this to me: Take away my Dad
forever !"
For the next seven years, I struggled on and off... 阅读全帖 |
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m****a
发帖数: 9485 | 8 To all investigators of Mormonism AKA Restoration Christianity:
I promise that God will answer your prayers and let you know through the
undeniable power of the Holy Spirit that "Mormonism" -- Restored Gospel of
Jesus Christ -- is true.
Those who tell you otherwise have been deceived or are intentionally leading
you astray.
TO ALL MEMBERS of the LDS Church:
I promise that as you bear testimony of Jesus Christ's gospel, Joseph Smith'
s prophetic mission and the truths that were restored through h... 阅读全帖 |
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s****y
发帖数: 1574 | 9 这厮还向很多有夫之妇求婚，结果，被拒~~~~
--Joseph Smith's Failed Proposals to Married Women
*John Taylor's Wife, Leonora
"The Prophet went to the home of President Taylor, and said to him, 'Brother
John, I WANT LEONORA.'" Taylor was stunned, but after walking the floor all
night, the obedient elder said to Smith, "If GOD wants Leonora He can have
her." Woodruff concluded: "That was all the prophet was after, to see where
President Taylor stood in the matter, and said to him, Brother Taylor, I
dont want your wife,... 阅读全帖 |
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e*******d
发帖数: 461 | 10 .
Several years later, LD called Fe in a spring festival. Fe was so happy
to hear from us since we hadn’t called him in three years. I talked with
Fe for only about five minutes. I got off the phone angrily. Things
never changed for Fe. He teased me like I was a 10 year old. He always
did this to me. I always felt angry when he treated me like a child. He
was such a sensitive person and he knew that inside I was just a kid.
He talked with LD for about an hour. I pretended that I didn’t care. But |
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e*******d
发帖数: 461 | 11 【 以下文字转载自 Prose 讨论区 】
发信人: echofield (飞), 信区: Prose
标 题: Valerian Ocean Chapter 8 (1)– Become certified
发信站: BBS 未名空间站 (Fri Oct 7 22:43:52 2011, 美东)
Desire has two children: power and weakness. Because of her desire, Wenyan
had been powerful, despite the fact that she was beaten up by a gangster.
She can make me do anything. When I saw her walking toward me, I knew that
she wanted something from me. Under my arm, there was a book. I had planned
to spend my Friday night reading this book. I ask... 阅读全帖 |
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e*******d
发帖数: 461 | 12 .
Several years later, LD called Fe in a spring festival. Fe was so happy
to hear from us since we hadn’t called him in three years. I talked with
Fe for only about five minutes. I got off the phone angrily. Things
never changed for Fe. He teased me like I was a 10 year old. He always
did this to me. I always felt angry when he treated me like a child. He
was such a sensitive person and he knew that inside I was just a kid.
He talked with LD for about an hour. I pretended that I didn’t care. But |
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e*******d
发帖数: 461 | 13 Desire has two children: power and weakness. Because of her desire, Wenyan
had been powerful, despite the fact that she was beaten up by a gangster.
She can make me do anything. When I saw her walking toward me, I knew that
she wanted something from me. Under my arm, there was a book. I had planned
to spend my Friday night reading this book. I asked Wenyan nervously: “What
do you want?” She said: you are going to dress up for a dance party. Put
your novel aside.” Am I supposed to be surprised? P... 阅读全帖 |
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e*******d
发帖数: 461 | 14 Desire has two children: power and weakness. Because of her desire, Wenyan
had been powerful, despite the fact that she was beaten up by a gangster.
She can make me do anything. When I saw her walking toward me, I knew that
she wanted something from me. Under my arm, there was a book. I had planned
to spend my Friday night reading this book. I asked Wenyan nervously: “What
do you want?” She said: you are going to dress up for a dance party. Put
your novel aside.” Am I supposed to be surprised? P... 阅读全帖 |
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j***j
发帖数: 9831 | 15 论杜十娘与茶花女的文化悲剧意蕴 论杜十娘与茶花女的文化悲剧意蕴<<隐藏
西北民族大学学报 ( 哲学社会科学版) 中国民族学类核心期刊 J. NORTHWEST
UNIVERSITY FOR NATIONAL ITIES ( Philosophy and Social Science) 2007 年第 4
期 No. 4. 2007 论杜十娘与茶花女的文化悲剧意蕴伍联群 ( 四川大学 文学与新闻学
院 ,四川 成都 610065) [ 摘 ]
《杜十娘怒沉百宝箱》 《茶花女》 要 和 两部作品都讲述了一个具有悲剧色彩的爱情
故事 .杜十娘和茶花女的 命运表现了作家的思想观念 .她们的悲剧 ,不仅是男主人公
的软弱性格造成的 ,更是因为社会制度和道德观念所致 .男 女主人公都是社会制度和
社会道德观念的牺牲品 .中西方两位作家通过他们笔下人物的遭遇 ,对主人公们所处的
社会 制度和道德提出了批判 .在杜十娘和茶花女的身上体现了中西方作者不同的文化
心理和道德观念 . [ 关键词 ] 杜十娘 ; 茶花女 ; 悲剧 ; 道德批判 [ 中图分类号 ]
I0 - 03 [ 文献标识码 ] A [ ... 阅读全帖 |
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c****t
发帖数: 19049 | 16 AN ORISON OF SONMI~451
On behalf of my ministry, thank you for agreeing to this final interview.
Please remember, this
isn’t an interrogation, or a trial. Your version of the truth is the only
one that matters.
TRUTH IS SINGULAR. ITS “VERSIONS” ARE MISTRUTHS.
… Good. Ordinarily, I begin by asking prisoners to recall their earliest
memories to provide a
context for corpocratic historians of the future. Fabricants have no
earliest memories,
Archivist. One twenty-four-hour cycle in Papa Song’s is i... 阅读全帖 |
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D*****r
发帖数: 6791 | 17
这句显然是针对基督徒常喊的一个口号而写在剧本里的，没有幽默感……
The General's office in a military station on the east front in Beotia.
An office table with a telephone, writing materials, official papers, etc.,
is set across the room. At the end of the table, a comfortable chair for the
General. Behind the chair, a window. Facing it at the other end of the
table, a plain wooden bench. At the side of the table, with its back to the
door, acommon chair, with a typewriter before it. Beside the door, which is
opposite the e... 阅读全帖 |
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D*****r
发帖数: 6791 | 18 http://www.gutenberg.org/files/37726/37726-h/37726-h.htm
IN GOD'S WAY
SCHOOL-DAYS
I.
In the melting snow on the hill-side by the sea, in the last rays of the
evening sun, stood a boy of fourteen, awestruck. He looked toward the west,
out across the sea; he looked toward the east, over town and shore and the
broad hills; in the background still higher peaks rose far away in the clear
sky.
The storm had lasted a long time; it had been more terrible, too, than any
the old people could remember. In ... 阅读全帖 |
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n********n
发帖数: 8336 | 19 一对美国父女关于政治的PK
2015-11-02 万吉庆 译 辣笔萧三匝
FATHER-DAUGHTERTALK --a must read（原标题）
编者按：保守*主义、自*由主*义是美国两大政治思潮，对美国政治影响重大。一般来
说，共和党是典型的保守*主义政党，民主党是典型的自*由主*义政党。但必须指出，
因为语境的不同，中美两国自*由主*义的所指不同，甚至截然相反。在美国，自*由主*
义主张某种意义上的平等，属于左派思潮。下文对美国自*由主*义的批评或有戏剧性夸
大之嫌，还请读者注意。
有位年轻的姑娘即将结束大一学业。就像其他同龄人一样，她自视为自*由主*义者，在
各种自由派观点中，她尤为赞同征收重税，支持政府的各类福利计划，换言之，重新分
配财富。
Ayoung woman was about to finish her first year of University. Like so
manyothers her age, she considered herself to be very liberal, and among
otherliberal ideals,... 阅读全帖 |
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e*****n
发帖数: 244 | 20 generally, they r very kind.
after grade 93 (inclusive), much more lovely and pretty than their
previous JIeJie as a whole.
willa, is very attractive and beautiful. and one of my friend was kicked
by his gf since he jsut stared at willa in library when his gf
stare at him angrily. hehe |
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m****r
发帖数: 383 | 21 > For all U busy busy people....................
> A man came home from work late again, tired and irritated, to find his 5
> year old son waiting for him at the door. "Daddy, may I ask you a
> question?"
> "Yeah, sure, what is it?" replied the man. "Daddy, how much money do you
> make an hour?" "That's none of your business! What makes you ask
> such a
> thing?" the man said angrily.
> "I just want to know. Please tell me, how much do you make an hour?"
> pleaded the little boy. "If you |
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a*****c
发帖数: 3525 | 22 从这个词(Hokkien dialect)才知道这个牛妈妈是福建人。
http://online.wsj.com/article/SB1000142405274870411150457605971
* The Wall Street Journal
* THE SATURDAY ESSAY
* JANUARY 8, 2011
Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior
Can a regimen of no playdates, no TV, no computer games and hours of music
practice create happy kids? And what happens when they fight back?
By AMY CHUA
A lot of people wonder how Chinese parents raise such stereotypically
successful kids. They wonder what these parents do to produce so ma... 阅读全帖 |
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T********l
发帖数: 1670 | 23 Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior
THE SATURDAY ESSAY JANUARY 8, 2011
By AMY CHUA
A lot of people wonder how Chinese parents raise such stereotypically successful kids. They wonder what these parents do to produce so many math whizzes and music prodigies, what
it's like inside the family, andwhether they could do it too. Well, I can tell them, because I've done it. Here are some things my daughters, Sophia and Louisa, were never allowed to do:
• attend a sleepover
• have a playdate
&#... 阅读全帖 |
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m**i
发帖数: 8296 | 24 Loituma - "Ievan Polkka" (Eva's Polka)1996
==>
==>
上歌词——
Finnish:
Nuapurista kuulu se polokan tahti
jalakani pohjii kutkutti.
Ievan äiti se tyttöösä vahti
vaan kyllähän Ieva sen jutkutti,
sillä ei meitä silloin kiellot haittaa
kun myö tanssimme laiasta laitaan.
Salivili hipput tupput täppyt
äppyt tipput hilijalleen.
Ievan suu oli vehnäsellä
ko immeiset onnee toevotti.
Peä oli märkänä jokaisella
ja viulu se vinku... 阅读全帖 |
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H******e
发帖数: 4682 | 25 哈哈, 哈哈, 你和和你"打架"的joj, 一样的对女ID很sweet啊
千古传唱也比不上版友的真心赞赏, heart flower angrily blossoms now :) |
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m******1
发帖数: 86 | 26 Ok, I know I might scared (if not scared away) a lot CPAs here. You may feel
like I’m too judgmental and some may even feel humiliated for the way I
talk. Actually, if you have chance to deal with me (career or personal), I’
m confident you will have a pleasant, if not highly pleasant, experience
except for the initial brain storm process. From the bottom of my heart, I
never want to hurt anybody (especially lady’s) feeling, unfortunately, I
did it sometimes and I apologize sincerely for the hur... 阅读全帖 |
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m******o
发帖数: 3372 | 27 飞机上看了alice's adventures in wonderland
"When we were little," the Mock Turtle went on at last, more
calmly, though still sobbing a little now and then, "we went
to school in the sea. The master was an old Turtle--we used
to call him Tortoise--"
"Why did you call him Tortoise, if he wasn't one?" Alice asked.
We called him Tortoise because he taught us," said the Mock
Turtle angrily. "Really you are very dull!" |
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g*********1
发帖数: 725 | 28 再次感谢茶馆各位，今天跟对方保险公司交涉，他们下午回复说同意责任全部在他们那一方。能这么快有一个满意的结果有点出乎我们意料，能这么快有一个满意的结果有点出乎我们意料，因为出事的当天下午，对方保险公司给我们打电话问询了一下情况以后还声称可能不会赔偿。我认为很大程度上得力于我们准备的一份statement。我想贴在这儿，以后如果碰到类似的事情也许对大家有启发。
statement:
First, let me tell you some background:
1. The car accident happened at approximately 8:18 AM just in front of the community (****) where I have lived for more than 5 years. Almost every morning, I pass that intersection to go to work or drop my kids to the daycare. I have never tried to make a left turn wit... 阅读全帖 |
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g*********1
发帖数: 725 | 29 再次感谢茶馆各位，今天跟对方保险公司交涉，他们下午回复说同意责任全部在他们那一方。能这么快有一个满意的结果有点出乎我们意料，能这么快有一个满意的结果有点出乎我们意料，因为出事的当天下午，对方保险公司给我们打电话问询了一下情况以后还声称可能不会赔偿。我认为很大程度上得力于我们准备的一份statement。我想贴在这儿，以后如果碰到类似的事情也许对大家有启发。
statement:
First, let me tell you some background:
1. The car accident happened at approximately 8:18 AM just in front of the community (****) where I have lived for more than 5 years. Almost every morning, I pass that intersection to go to work or drop my kids to the daycare. I have never tried to make a left turn wit... 阅读全帖 |
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k*****u
发帖数: 1313 | 30 【 以下文字转载自 WenMang 俱乐部 】
发信人: kubuntu (有人说我像孙爸爸), 信区: WenMang
标 题: 养家糊口的艰辛
发信站: BBS 未名空间站 (Fri May 21 10:44:55 2010, 美东)
Can I Borrow $5?
A woman came home from work late, tired and irritated, to find her 5-year
old son waiting for her
at the door.
SON: 'Mummy, may I ask you a question?'
MUM: 'Yeah sure, what it is?' replied the woman.
SON: 'Mummy, how much do you make an hour?'
MUM: 'That's none of your business. Why do you ask such a thing?' the woman
said angrily.
SON: 'I just want to know. P |
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c*****y
发帖数: 7647 | 31 Chinese parents can get away with things that Western parents can't. Once
when I was young—maybe more than once—when I was extremely disrespectful
to my mother, my father angrily called me "garbage" in our native Hokkien
dialect. It worked really well. I felt terrible and deeply ashamed of what
I had done. But it didn't damage my self-esteem or anything like that. I
knew exactly how highly he thought of me. I didn't actually think I was
worthless or feel like a piece of garbage.
As an adult, I o... 阅读全帖 |
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o******e
发帖数: 750 | 32 不知从什么时候起，养成了在上班的路上坐车的时候，读上那么一篇our daily bread
的习惯，有时真觉得满有收获的。今天，需要换一本新的小册子了，于是把以前的这三
个月的小文章翻了翻，挑几个我最喜欢的和大家分享。。。
#1 先贴一个我最喜欢的--4月1号 （我把出处注明了再转贴，应该没有版权问题吧？）
http://www.rbc.org/devotionals/our-daily-bread/2008/04/01/devotion.aspx
呵呵，我开车好像就是这个样子地。。。
I love the story of the stressed-out woman who was tailgating a man as they
drove on a busy boulevard. When he slowed to a stop at a yellow light, the
woman hit the horn, cussing and screaming in frustration and gesturing
angrily. As she was still in mi |
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