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发帖数: 2153 | 1 So, you’ve been eyeing that smart, attractive scientist you’re lucky
enough to know personally. You’re intrigued. Your scientist is smart, funny
, confident. Visions of Louis de Broglie or Rosalind Franklin putting on
their safety glasses and lab coats to come to do experiments with you runs
through your head..
Who can blame you? Science is a sexy occupation.
But scientists aren’t like the bimbos you usually pick up at the bar. Nor
are they the assholes you ladies continually fall for. No, scientists are
different beings (which is why you’re attracted to them in the first place)
, and you should realize — before jumping in — that this isn’t going to
be a run-of-the-mill, boring, lame relationship you’re used to.
Here’s what you need to know:
1. We can figure things out. Understand, we’re paid to dig deep, find the
secrets and wade through bullshit. We can pick up on subtleties, so what you
think you are hiding from us won’t be hidden for long. Sure, we’ll act
surprised when you eventually tell us you failed freshman biology in college
— but we already knew.
We don’t take shit from anyone, so don’t lie to us or give a load of
bullshit. We spend all day separating fact from fiction, listening to
scientific supply sales reps and dealing with students’ bullshit. If you
make us do the same with you, you’re just gonna piss us off. And don’t
think we’ll be quiet about it. We’ll respond with the vengeance of an
science blogger railing against some researcher’s recently-retracted paper
— and we’ll enjoy doing it.
Just tell us the truth. We can handle it.
2. At some point, you will be a topic. For either a research project or
blog post covering an area of research, something you’ve done or said will
be the motivation. Get over it. Consider it a compliment, even if we’re
arguing against you in print.
Think about it: we live our lives doing and writing about science. If you’
re a part of our life, we’re going to do science on or scientifically write
about you, your thoughts or a subject springing from one of the two.
Don’t be upset when an argument against your adoration of homeopathy turns
up on our blog. We’re not directing the writing at you, personally — your
ignorance was just our inspiration (there, doesn’t that make you feel
better?).
3. Yes, we think we’re smarter than you. In fact, we know it. Does that
smack of ego? Absolutely — but that confidence is what makes your heart go
pitter-patter.
We have a strong, working knowledge of how the world works. That makes us
great in conversation. We can delve into the intricacies of scientific laws,
national and international research, where to find the good instruments,
what’s happening with science fiction, what the good gamers are playing and
more.
But there are pitfalls.
Guaranteed, when you say “evolutionary psychology” we will automatically
say “bullshit” — “evolutionary psychology” is not science. We’re not
trying to call you dumb (even though you don’t understand basic science),
it’s habit. The same will happen when you say “causation” when you mean
“correlation”.
We carry ourselves with a certain arrogant air. Embrace it (that’s what
attracted you to us in the first place, after all). Don’t be surprised if
we’re not impressed when you say, “I’m a scientist, too.” No, you are
not. The fact that you sit in a coffee shop wearing @ThinkGeek t-shirts
while reading @sciam does not make you a scientist. Nor does the fact that
you “did some experiments in college” or that one day you want to “find a
cure for the common cold.”
Look, we’re paid to do science. Every day. What’s more, our science
matters. It changes opinions, affects decisions and connects people with the
world around them.
We’re not spewing our data or trying to fabricate an aura of creativity. We
study the real world — with real consequences.
Our research papers goes through three or four cranky editors who make us
revise it before it’s printed a few hundred thousand times and distributed
all over the world. You don’t do that unless you’re confident, even
egotistical.
You may have some great notebook entries, scientific questions and
rudimentary research ideas — good for you. Just don’t assume we’ll accept
that as on par with what we do (unless you’re really hot, then hell, you’
re a better scientist than I).
4. You’re not less important than the job — the job is just more
important than anything else. One doesn’t become a scientist to sit in an
office from 9 to 5 Monday through Friday.
We do take our work home. If science is happening, we’ll drop whatever we’
re doing — even if it’s with you — to study it. We’re always looking for
fundable research ideas, so yes, we’ll stop on the street to write
something down, interview grad students or gather information for a grant.
On that same note, don’t get upset if you call us on grant deadline
suggesting some afternoon nookie and we say, “I’ve got to put the paper to
bed first.” That could mean hours from now, but we’ll have plenty of time
to put you in bed later.
5. You won’t be disappointed. Scientists are intense, driven, passionate
folk. We carry those same attributes into our relationships, making it an
extremely fun ride well worth the price of admission. Our lives are never
boring and each day is different.
If the pitfalls are scaring you away, consider this:
The fact that we’re inquisitive means we’ll listen to you. Even if it does
seem like an interview, we’re paying attention to what you have to say (
see rule No. 1).
We’ll write about you or your thoughts because you’re an important part of
our life and we care about you (see rule No. 2).
Our brains are a great resource. Ever go on a date with an attractive person
and wind up wishing you hadn’t because everything they say is just, well,
stupid? That’s not going to happen here (see rule No. 3).
Yes, it may seem that we put the job ahead of you, but we’re driven. You’
re not with that loser whose life is going nowhere and who’s completely
content being mediocre (see rule No. 4).
There you go, five things you should know before dating a scientist.
http://www.thejayfk.com/?p=1709 |
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