T**********e 发帖数: 29576 | 1 【 以下文字转载自 Military 讨论区 】
发信人: TravisBickle (Travis), 信区: Military
标 题: SW的署名文章:If I Had to Poison My Roommate,
发信站: BBS 未名空间站 (Mon May 13 22:09:08 2013, 美东)
这是恶搞吗?还是学辛普森的“If I did it”?
If I Had to Poison My Roommate, I’d Definitely Go with Thallium
Monday, May 13, 2013
by Sun Wei
Sun Wei was Zhu Ling’s roommate at Tsinghua University both times she was
poisoned.
When it comes to poisoning someone you know, we face a plethora of options.
In recent days, we’ve seen a student at Fudan University kill his roommate
by slipping N-Nitrosodimethylamine into the room’s water dispenser.
We’ve also seen the head of a kindergarten inject tetramine, a strong rat
poison, into yogurt which killed two young girls at a rival school.
Those aren’t bad choices. But if, hypothetically, I had to poison someone,
I’d probably go with thallium.
Stay with me for a minute.
Let’s say I had a college roommate who was beautiful, smart and an
accomplished musician. And let’s say, oh I don’t know, I was jealous of
her looks and ability and someone asked me, “If you had to poison your
unbearably perfect roommate, how would you do it?”
First, I would call the police and report the matter. Poisoning someone is a
serious crime.
But let’s just say, for the sake of argument, this person put a gun to my
head and I had to come up with an answer. Well, in that case, I’d
definitely choose thallium.
Here’s why: first, I used to work in a lab at Tsinghua and regularly came
into contact with dangerous compounds and thallium was easily accessible.
Two, thallium is toxic in small doses, easily soluble and nearly tasteless
so it would be trivial to drop some in a drink and hand it to an
unsuspecting roomie.
Third, thallium poisoning causes intense pain and hair loss, a fitting
punishment for someone who was always the center of attention.
For these reasons, I strongly believe that there’s no better choice for
getting rid of your overachieving roommate than thallium.
But what if, for instance, they survive the attempt on their life because
you didn’t use enough thallium? What then?
Well, if this happened, and the roommate recovered and returned to school, I
’d probably—and I’m just riffing here—lie low for a while, then poison
her again three months later.
Not that anyone would ever act upon these repugnant desires, but if they did
, I’d advise them to have a plan B. You never know what might go wrong when
you’re trying to kill someone.
In the unlikely event that your target evades death for a second time, a
good plan B, for example, would be to use your family connections to quash
the police investigation, then enter into a sham marriage and emigrate to a
country with no extradition treaties with China, like United States.
Anyway, if I had to poison my roommate and get away with it, that’s
probably how I’d do it. Yup, that’s exactly how I would.
http://www.miniharm.com/2013/05/13/if-i-had-to-poison-my-roomma | s****l 发帖数: 16457 | | l**s 发帖数: 20567 | | T**********e 发帖数: 29576 | 4
写得挺风趣,铊要能写出来也算有才。
【在 s****l 的大作中提到】 : haha,good one
| T**********e 发帖数: 29576 | 5
she didn't look cool wearing sun glasses.
【在 l**s 的大作中提到】 : 铊女真够土的 : 掉渣。。。。
| l**s 发帖数: 20567 | 6 铊真够土八路的
哪里能和ZL比哈
一看就明白了
为啥ZL 被铊毒 | y*****y 发帖数: 1208 | 7 pretty funny sh1t....but sadly may be true | n*****m 发帖数: 9872 | 8 哈哈
这个签名档不错
【在 T**********e 的大作中提到】 : : she didn't look cool wearing sun glasses.
| T**********e 发帖数: 29576 | 9
good writing, I agree.
【在 y*****y 的大作中提到】 : pretty funny sh1t....but sadly may be true
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