a*****g 发帖数: 19398 | 1 老师不干了~Two teachers, two cities, second year.
Monday, July 27, 2015
A fond farewell
Having just sent my resignation to the nyc dept of ed, I breathe a huge sigh
of relief and allow the past few years of memories to flood my current mind
. I've heard before that after a break-up, your brain allows you to keep the
happy memories, but the negative ones are stored away somewhere else. You
want to remember the good times, so much so that those negative memories
seem to fade in comparison and you start to doubt why or if you were ever
unhappy.
Well, after a 2 year emotional rollercoaster, I have a lot to say. But I'm
not sure what should be stated online, what should be talked about
individually, what not to say. I will say this though, teachers staying,
teachers leaving, new teachers, I will talk to anyone who wants to. Everyone
's experiences are different, everyone has different methods of venting,
mine just so happens to be talking it out with people.
I won't lie, this post is hard to write. But I feel it important to share
with you all, since I started this online journey 2 years ago. Schools been
out for a month now, and after a month of varied emotions from breaking down
and crying to laughing over random memories, I feel I am able to finally
stand back and speak out without being too emotional.
So here goes, just some of my thoughts:
1) Working with students is tiresome, frustrating, and rewarding like no
other. Its the cliche statement, I know. During the year, it was some of the
hardest times. By no means is it easy on a daily basis, or even 2 periods
in a row, but I am able to look back and see the relationships I have built
with my students. The daily few who would eat lunch with me during their
lunch period, hunting me down if they couldn't find me, inputting their
number in my phone under "fave student" (yes that really happened).
2) Building a program is hard. As in in the duration of my thus far short-
lived life, this has to have been one of the most difficult things. I
definitely don't want to belittle the work that every teacher does, as every
teacher creates and adapts to every student, everyday. But I will speak for
myself and starting a Mandarin program at a school where the kids didn't
even know what Mandarin was, I heard racist jokes left and right. And while
it has not completely gone away, I have seen the interest rise, the
knowledge grow, I even had students asking about traveling to Taiwan/China,
and furthering their studies in college. This is what I want to take away.
But, as people will ask, then why the job change?
Before I start my rant, please know that this is after thoughtful reflection
and deep self-evaluating. This is however, my own thoughts and although I
will try to not sound like a whiny child, that may just be how it comes
across.
1) Teaching is under-valued. In today's society, we blame teachers for
everything, from grades to differentiation, to classroom decor. We're
scrutinized for every little detail, and it automatically becomes a "blame
it on the teacher" whenever something goes wrong. Student throwing things?
Teacher must be blamed. Student refuses to do work? Teacher's fault.
2) The evaluation system is ridiculous. In what other professions does a
supervisor come up unannounced with a clipboard in hand while you are
working, stand behind you, and evaluate you on what you are doing at that
moment? If this is happening in other places, please, please let me know.
This "got you" system has got to go.
I have so much I want to say, but I'll leave it at this for now.
So, what next, you may ask. For those still curious and reading, I... don't
know. and I'm ok with that.
Goodbye, NYC DOE. It's been real. |
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