L**********g
发帖数: 498 | 1 【 以下文字转载自 Joke 讨论区 】
发信人: cnmitbbs (newtiger), 信区: Joke
标 题: 黄牛对白男果然能忍
发信站: BBS 未名空间站 (Thu Feb 22 23:04:04 2018, 美东)
https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/7zhn0s/update_i_23f_broke_up
_with_my_ex_22m_because_his/
记得看原帖，里面有链接
Hi, all. It's been a year since I made this post. Obviously, as the title
states, he is now my ex. I am thankful for all the straightforward comments
that most of you made on that thread because it really catapulted me into
action. This is gonna be a long post, so I have a tl;dr version at the
bottom. Since that post, I ended up writing the letter that I said I was
going to write. I still have that letter to serve as a reminder of how much
"compromise" I had to make at one point because I thought I wasn't worth it.
The letter disparaged the racist dad, to the point where he called his son
and screamed about how I was a terrorist!
Fast forward to a couple of months later, I was weeks from graduating from
college and found out my aunt, who was basically my second mother, was dying
of her second battle of breast cancer. It was too late for her to find out
because at that point, her cancer had already spread through her lymph nodes
. Four weeks after, she passed away in her sleep, and I was spiraling into
depression. At this time, I broke up with my ex, saying that we were both
young, and there is always room to change for the both of us. If it doesn't
work out now, it may work out years down the road. He didn't fight it much,
and he pretended like nothing happened until, three days later, he drank a
half bottle of vodka straight and told me he was contemplating suicide.
Growing up, my mother always guilt tripped me with suicidal threats, but I
grew accustomed to it; however, this was a different person, and I was in a
vulnerable state of mind. I ran out of the apartment (we were living
together), and I went to one of my best friend's place in a panic because I
didn't know what to do. He said we should call suicide hotline and ask them
for the best course of action. The operator said that we should start by
doing a wellness check on him, since at that point it had been almost an
hour since I left him alone. I called the police to do a wellness check, and
I told our roommate to keep an eye on my ex. When the police came, my ex
was in our room, crying, and they talked briefly before he asked the police
to take him for immediate professional help.
Long story short, my ex went to a mental rehab place, where his parents,
sister, and cousins blamed me for causing him to want to die and terrorized
me over Facebook and text messages for days. When he got out, I stupidly
listened to his doctor's advice to continue living with him because he was
suffering from maladaptive personality. So we got another apartment lease
together, and I went back to my home country to clear my mind.
When I visited my parents, I told my dad everything, and one thing he told
me that made me feel good about my decision to leave was: You might not see
it, but you are worth so much. Don't let other people tell you they love you
if they can't do anything for you because love is sacrifice. Just days
after arriving, my best friend (now boyfriend) flew from Korea to visit me
back home to give moral support, and I was beginning to climb up from the
hole that depression dug me into.
I came back to the US with a better state of mind. I got a job and was
beginning to feel more like myself until my ex (remember when I said I made
the stupid decision to continue living with him?) started sexually
assaulting me and pretending like he never did. He also would berate me
about having sex every day, literally every other message was, "Can we do
something dirty tonight? I wanna fuck you on the balcony." Luckily, our
apartment complex let me out of the lease early and penalty-free after three
months because I couldn't handle it anymore.
Fast forward to today, I bought a condo, got into grad school for a
chemistry PhD program, and I am in a super healthy (but long distance :'( )
relationship with a man who loves me and is willing to cross oceans for me (
he's visiting again in April!) because he said I'm worth it.
Sorry for the long-ass wall of text, but I just wanted to express my
gratitude to everyone who shamed me enough into leaving the POS :D
tl;dr: Left my spineless ex and his raging racist of a dad, life took a turn
for the worse, fixed everything, and now I am a homeowner, working on her
PhD, and am with a man who thinks the world of me.
原帖
Hi, all. A little backstory: My boyfriend and I have been together for 3.5
years. The first year and a half, I tried really hard to be close to his
immediate family (parents, three younger sisters). In the year and a half,
the father, he continuously made racist and sexist remarks towards me, and
he belittled everything I had ever done. When I first went off to college,
he told his son that I would just cheat on my boyfriend because there are
more boys who would be more available. This father would also encourage his
daughters to make racist remarks towards me, especially in public places.
When I asked the girls to stop, the father became upset because he said I
was trying to teach him how to raise his kids.
Fast forward to now, I am just realizing that the father has been telling
everyone in the extended family about the conflict he and I have. This year,
I came to their Christmas dinner (and have been sleeping over with my
boyfriend at the grandparents', place), and I have been confronted about
this conflict twice now by one of the uncles. This same uncle asked me to
fix the problem because the father will probably be my father-in-law (which
I am now questioning, to be honest). The grandparents, in the past, have
also asked me about this conflict, but I tried not to point fingers at
anyone. Before, I felt comfortable being around my boyfriend's family, but
now I feel extremely anxious, and I feel like everyone is watching every
movement that I make.
I love my boyfriend very much. I have always thought we would get married
once we're both in grad school, but now with this happening, I don't know if
I am selfish to stay with him because it feels like I'm causing a rift
between him and the rest of his family because he takes my side. I also don'
t know if I can handle his father's future involvement (if there will be any
) once we are married. Any rational advice is welcome here.
Edit: My boyfriend and his family are Caucasians, while I am an Asian woman
who immigrated to the US a decade ago, if this helps.
Tl;Dr: My boyfriend's dad dislikes me and spreads rumors about me to
extended family, and the extended family is now asking me left and right
about this issue. | P**T
发帖数: 2274 | 2 外F竟敢玷污白大人的高贵血统，让白大人的后代都变成劳模，实属罪该万死！！！！
！ | L**********g
发帖数: 498 | 3 外F自知罪该万死，被操了3.5年外加分手后继续操了3个月后，找了棒子接盘
【在 P**T 的大作中提到】
: 外F竟敢玷污白大人的高贵血统，让白大人的后代都变成劳模，实属罪该万死！！！！
: ！
|
|
