L****o
发帖数: 1642 | 1 A Wild Goose Chase
On the southern bank of Lake Erie,
I was an apparent stranger among locals.
I was not a treasure hunter, rather a wild goose chaser,
even though these two might have the same fate.
I was not disappointed though.
A fleet of wild geese flying afar
melted into the sunset, just the scene
I have dreamt of over and over again.
The air vibrated with my heart beats, which in turn
rhymed with the flutters of the geese's wings.
Above the water, a kite flew high.
A gust bent its path of return.
Near the water, a flower looked down,
but couldn't find its falling petals on the ground.
"Come back." I was calling all those that have been gone,
but nothing did, not even an echo.
At this moment, like any other moment in life,
I am at a point of no return.
I would never see the first love, the first kiss,
or the birth of the first child starting over again,
no matter how far I have traveled.
I'll continue to search and chase,
till one day I finally figure out
what the metaphor of my last sunset really means.
That might be the moment I myself melt into it.
(2015.5.9)
("wild goose chase" is an idiom, means a futile pursuit.) |
M********c
发帖数: 11672 | |
wh
发帖数: 141625 | 3 赞。is life a futile pursuit, full of human-imposed meaning... 猜想最后一个
it可以不要？
【在 L****o 的大作中提到】
: A Wild Goose Chase
: On the southern bank of Lake Erie,
: I was an apparent stranger among locals.
: I was not a treasure hunter, rather a wild goose chaser,
: even though these two might have the same fate.
: I was not disappointed though.
: A fleet of wild geese flying afar
: melted into the sunset, just the scene
: I have dreamt of over and over again.
: The air vibrated with my heart beats, which in turn
|
L****o
发帖数: 1642 | 4 好像有点。人有七情六欲，要是不刻意回避，在作品里都会自然而然表现出来吧，这样
的好处是作品就有了多样性。
【在 M********c 的大作中提到】
: 有点伤感啊。
|
a*o
发帖数: 25262 | |
L****o
发帖数: 1642 | 6 最后一个it指代sunset，去掉也可以，根据前文sunset is implied，但有些读者不会
马上想到，为避免造成阅读障碍，我觉得还是保留好些。
【在 wh 的大作中提到】
: 赞。is life a futile pursuit, full of human-imposed meaning... 猜想最后一个
: it可以不要？
|
L****o
发帖数: 1642 | 7 对，是原创，否则会注明原作者及出处。
【在 a*o 的大作中提到】
: 原创？
: 不错啊。。
|
wh
发帖数: 141625 | 8 嗯。如果去掉it，那就是指melt into the moment。如果后面的从句是个完整句，好像
加个when (that might be the moment when i myself melt into it）读起来更顺。
大概when也可以省略，等auo来显摆他的英语知识，哈哈。
【在 L****o 的大作中提到】
: 最后一个it指代sunset，去掉也可以，根据前文sunset is implied，但有些读者不会
: 马上想到，为避免造成阅读障碍，我觉得还是保留好些。
|
a*o
发帖数: 25262 | 9 原来这样，还以为 it 是指 metaphor 。。
【在 L****o 的大作中提到】
: 最后一个it指代sunset，去掉也可以，根据前文sunset is implied，但有些读者不会
: 马上想到，为避免造成阅读障碍，我觉得还是保留好些。
|
a*o
发帖数: 25262 | 10 写诗的有时候语法可以乱来的。。
诗是没有空间限制。。
也是小混混。。哈哈哈。。。
【在 wh 的大作中提到】
: 嗯。如果去掉it，那就是指melt into the moment。如果后面的从句是个完整句，好像
: 加个when (that might be the moment when i myself melt into it）读起来更顺。
: 大概when也可以省略，等auo来显摆他的英语知识，哈哈。
|
wh
发帖数: 141625 | 11 shot也这么说。我觉得不是真的乱来。近代诗引进很多东方式的无动词或无主语的情景
白描，有缺省但不违（反语）法。也有故意的违法，但不离谱。我也说不好。最好有研
究诗的native speaker来读读说说……
【在 a*o 的大作中提到】
: 写诗的有时候语法可以乱来的。。
: 诗是没有空间限制。。
: 也是小混混。。哈哈哈。。。
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