h****r
发帖数: 258 | 1 http://www.crawlingroad.com/blog/2014/07/02/google-announces-ne
BY CRAIG ROWLAND · 2 JULY, 2014
Today Google announced their new OpenHires initiative for all future hiring
needs for the company. Based on open borders immigration theory, the new
initiative will eliminate all screening for employment at Google. Instead,
they will simply allow anyone to come in and start working regardless of
their qualifications, skill set, health, or need by the company. This new
policy is consistent with Google’s “Don’t Be Evil” corporate slogan.
Having standards is evil.
“At Google, we think that having standards for hiring people was just mean.
” said Google Director of People Operations Jonathan Beck. “We think a
more progressive view of hiring doesn’t need to look at the individual and
what they can contribute or how it will affect everyone else. In fact, the
use of hiring standards for employees was an infringement on the rights of
the individual. We need to be nicer, and having no standards is about as
nice as you can get.”
As part of the OpenHires process, Google has done away with any kind of
employment pre-screening, criminal background checks, character references,
health screening or even requiring any kind of schooling whatsoever. Instead
, in keeping with the values of today, Google will just start hiring anyone
who asks for a job, walks through the door, or even breaks in through a
window. As long as they can get in, they will have a job with Google.
The new OpenHires process features these core values in addition to the
above:
New hires will be responsible for hiring their relatives who will also be
brought in no questions asked.
Any child born on any Google campus, even by non-employees, will immediately
become a new employee of Google and be eligible for all employee benefits.
OpenHires will protect workers by not allowing them to be fired even for
egregious violations. Firing people is mean.
“We’re really excited about this new policy”, said Google CEO Larry Page,
“It will allow us to tap into the billions of unskilled workers around the
world we desperately need in our high-tech economy. Plus, it allows us to
grow our share price by offering these new workers really low wages below
what we can hire natives to do. Additionally, we found that we get a
secondary profit boost by making the local community pick up the tab in
terms of schooling, housing, and subsidizing these new employees and their
families in other ways. It’s a win-win for everyone.”
In terms of share price, Page stated: “We think our investors will be quite
pleased with the results, at least short-term. Longer term we are certain
these new hires will pick up valuable technical skills through osmosis and
drive Google to the next level of technological power. Google will show
everyone that standards for hiring are out of date. We have progressed
beyond those crude measures. We view the individual as having an absolute
right to come here and work no matter what.”
There are concerns that flooding the company with anyone that wants a job
without regard to their qualifications, or ability to fit into Google
culture, will be bad for the company long-term. Additionally, some employees
have quit in protest in having to pay higher fees for insurance, local
housing, and security services on the Google campus to deal with the
mysterious rise in crime. However, Google remains committed to the new
policy.
In response to these concerns, Google is implementing mandatory optional
sensitivity training. Any employee that complains will be fired in a
culturally sensitive way.
According to Beck: “In truth, we’ve had some people complain about
removing the previous standards we had for bringing people into the Google
family. But we know in our hearts that this just feels right. More
importantly, it feels right for the people coming in that need a job and
living support. And isn’t that what’s important, everyone’s feelings?”
Several prominent investors quietly sold their Google stock after the
announcement. None was available for comment, but sources say they are
nervous for the future of the company and the ability to attract and retain
top talent. However, a Google spokesman said the stock sales had nothing to
do with their new hiring policy. Rather, it reflected general market mood as
well as unenlightened attitudes on the part of the investors. | f***c
发帖数: 338 | 2 确认不是四月一号的新闻?还是我看错了?
Just walk in to start working?
hiring
mean.
【在 h****r 的大作中提到】
: http://www.crawlingroad.com/blog/2014/07/02/google-announces-ne
: BY CRAIG ROWLAND · 2 JULY, 2014
: Today Google announced their new OpenHires initiative for all future hiring
: needs for the company. Based on open borders immigration theory, the new
: initiative will eliminate all screening for employment at Google. Instead,
: they will simply allow anyone to come in and start working regardless of
: their qualifications, skill set, health, or need by the company. This new
: policy is consistent with Google’s “Don’t Be Evil” corporate slogan.
: Having standards is evil.
: “At Google, we think that having standards for hiring people was just mean.
| v***n
发帖数: 5085 | 3 hahaha
funny reading this morning. | s******y
发帖数: 936 | | t***t
发帖数: 6066 | 5 so for these come in and work employees, do they get paid? |
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