N****f
发帖数: 25759 | 1 【 以下文字转载自 WebRadio 讨论区 】
发信人: NWWolf (西北の狼), 信区: WebRadio
标 题: Little Known Facts about Santa Claus
发信站: BBS 未名空间站 (Sun Dec 28 14:00:46 2014, 美东)
A brief theological discussion with a six-year-old guru, which
occurred during the thought-inspiringly dizzy hours of the early
morning, in a comfy, toasty bed, the best place for such
sophisticated intellectual exchange:
Me: How do you think Santa gets into people’s chimneys, since
he’s so big?
Guru: You know, you can suck your belly in and hold your breath
—like this—and become a lot skinnier.
Me: Can you get into the chimney while doing that?
Guru: I’m not Santa! Santa is not an ordinary human. He can
make himself really, really skinny.
Me: You mean Santa turns himself into a snake at every house?
Guru: No! Not a snake! He needs hands to hold the presents!
Silly daddy.
Me: Good point. And how does he keep his clothes from getting
all dirty? If you get into the chimney you’ll come out all black,
right?
Guru: Santa has a broom. Before he goes in, first he goes "sweep
sweep sweep."
Me: At every house?
Guru: Yep. He has to.
Me: How would he have the time? He has so many houses to go
to all over the world—the United States, Mexico, China, Germany,
Madagascar; every country in the whole world, all in one night.
Guru: But every country has its own Santa.
Me: You mean there is a Santa just for the Unites States?
Guru: Yep.
Me: And there is a Santa for Cuba?
Guru: Yep.
Me: And there is a Santa for Haiti?
Guru: What’s Haiti?
Me: Never mind. So the Santa for Cuba will be done with his chores
a lot faster than the Santa for the United States, right? The United
States is a lot bigger, and it has more people and more houses for
Santa to visit.
Guru: I think so.
Me: Then what would the Santa for Cuba do for the rest of the night?
Guru: He comes to America and helps our Santa.
Me: What about the Santa for China? China has the most people,
and that means all the Santas all over the world will end up in
China eventually to help that Santa, right?
Guru: No. People in China live in big, tall buildings, all together.
It’s easier for Santa to visit them.
Me: But they don’t have fireplaces and chimneys. How does Santa
get in?
Guru: Santa doesn’t have to get in. He can leave the presents by
the door.
Me: But wouldn’t they get stolen?
Guru: No, because people don’t stay up that late.
Me: But your brother did.
Guru: He’s not bad people, daddy! Bad people don’t stay up that
late. They go to bed early on Christmas. They don’t steal stuff
when Santa’s around.
Me: Because they are afraid Santa would give them a lump of coal?
Guru: Oh yeah—what’s coal?
Me: …Let’s get up now.
And that was the end of the discussion, because that last question
was well beyond my limited intellectual capability. Nearly three hours
later, I am still wondering: How do you explain to a six-year-old born
and raised in suburban America what on earth coal is? | N****f
发帖数: 25759 | 2 同小女一席胡言乱语，如实纪录在案，转来供湘版故旧一乐，顺祝
诸位节日安好、阖家欢快、万事如意！ | h*****e
发帖数: 3619 | 3 哈哈，狼女好可爱！
我家傻丫头都十二岁了，前几天还跟我说她们学校有的小孩不相信有Santa。她对此很
迷惑不解的样子。
【在 N****f 的大作中提到】
: 同小女一席胡言乱语，如实纪录在案，转来供湘版故旧一乐，顺祝
: 诸位节日安好、阖家欢快、万事如意！
| N****f
发帖数: 25759 | 4 Forever young—that's a good quality. Don't you wish you
could still believe in Santa? :-)
【在 h*****e 的大作中提到】
: 哈哈，狼女好可爱！
: 我家傻丫头都十二岁了，前几天还跟我说她们学校有的小孩不相信有Santa。她对此很
: 迷惑不解的样子。
| b******b
发帖数: 2070 | 5 好萌的细妹子！
【在 N****f 的大作中提到】
: Forever young—that's a good quality. Don't you wish you
: could still believe in Santa? :-)
| b******b
发帖数: 2070 | 6 你家姑娘真是童心未泯啊，我家的好像8，9岁时就不相信了。
【在 h*****e 的大作中提到】
: 哈哈，狼女好可爱！
: 我家傻丫头都十二岁了，前几天还跟我说她们学校有的小孩不相信有Santa。她对此很
: 迷惑不解的样子。
| h**p
发帖数: 330 | 7 好玩，你家小娃还挺有条有理的。 我家的也是6岁，不过从来就不怎么信，即使告诉他
santa会给他礼物，也半信半疑的，没什么热情。 | h*****e
发帖数: 3619 | 8 大人要蒙哄才行的。圣诞前夜要在壁炉下给圣诞老人准备牛奶和饼干，第二天
牛奶要喝掉点，饼干也要吃掉点。有几年我还按圣诞老人的口气给小孩写信。
孩子相信得格格的
【在 h**p 的大作中提到】
: 好玩，你家小娃还挺有条有理的。 我家的也是6岁，不过从来就不怎么信，即使告诉他
: santa会给他礼物，也半信半疑的，没什么热情。
| N****f
发帖数: 25759 | 9 细妹子哪有不萌的，呵呵。
【在 b******b 的大作中提到】
: 好萌的细妹子！
| N****f
发帖数: 25759 | 10 您府上这位显然是未来科学家；俺家这位将来或许能做个
卓有成效的传教士。:-)
【在 h**p 的大作中提到】
: 好玩，你家小娃还挺有条有理的。 我家的也是6岁，不过从来就不怎么信，即使告诉他
: santa会给他礼物，也半信半疑的，没什么热情。
| N****f
发帖数: 25759 | 11 附注：这番探讨，源于圣诞节当天一次偶发事件：
【 以下文字转载自 WebRadio 讨论区 】
发信人: NWWolf (西北の狼), 信区: WebRadio
标 题: Re: Does Santa Claus exist?
发信站: BBS 未名空间站 (Fri Dec 26 04:51:55 2014, 美东)
今天才知道俺家小狼女信Santa信得有多虔诚。一大早听见她小人家在
楼下义愤填膺，要跟她哥玩命，原因是俺家老大玩了一整夜网络游戏，
壁炉彻夜未熄。小狼女认为此举严重影响Santa正常进出，后果之恶劣
及悲剧性无以言表。然而掉头一看，礼物早已整整齐齐摆在圣诞树下，
不禁大为惊诧。老妻只好推说Santa昨夜无法从烟囱进入，不得不转到
前门按了门铃，还是她哥开门迎客，收下所有礼物，小狼女这才转怒
为喜。 |
|
