D**N
发帖数: 1440 | 1 献给三八妇女节的小笑话
A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart.
The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.
"What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife.
"They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans." he replies.
"Put them back, we can't afford them." demands the wife, and so they carry
on shopping.
A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and
puts it in the basket.
"What do you think you're doing?" asks the husband.
"It's my face cream. It makes me look beautiful." replies the wife.
Her husband retorts: "So does 24 cans of Budweiser and it's half the price."
HUSBAND DOWN!
HUSBAND DOWN!
AISLE 7!!! | l*********e
发帖数: 5385 | 2 lol....
我晚上回来也给大家讲husband和wife的笑话~~
and
【在 D**N 的大作中提到】
: 献给三八妇女节的小笑话
: A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart.
: The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.
: "What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife.
: "They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans." he replies.
: "Put them back, we can't afford them." demands the wife, and so they carry
: on shopping.
: A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and
: puts it in the basket.
: "What do you think you're doing?" asks the husband.
| l**********o
发帖数: 9952 | | e**p
发帖数: 4259 | | l*********e
发帖数: 5385 | 5 笑话来啦~~~~
And Then The Fight Started
My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, "What's on TV?"
I said, "Dust."
And then the fight started.
======================================================================
My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds
."
I bought her a scale.
And then the fight started.
=====================================================================
When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her some place
expensive so, I took her to a gas station.
And then the fight started.
=====================================================================
After retiring, I went to the Social Security office to apply for Social
Security.
The woman behind the counter asked me for my driver's license to verify my
age.
I looked in my pockets and realized I had left my wallet at home.
I told the woman that I was very sorry, but I would have to go home and come
back later.
The woman said, "Unbutton your shirt".
So I opened my shirt revealing my curly silver hair.
She said, "That silver hair on your chest is proof enough for me" and she
processed my Social Security application.
When I got home, I excitedly told my wife about my experience at the Social
Security office.
She said, "you should have dropped your pants. You might have gotten
disability, too."
And then the fight started.
===============================================================
My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept
staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby
table.
My wife asked, "Do you know her?"
"Yes," I sighed, "She is my old girlfriend. I understand she took to
drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't
been sober since."
"My God!" says my wife, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating
that long?"
And then the fight started.
============================================================
I rear-ended a car this morning. So, there we were alongside the road and
slowly the other driver got out of his car.
You know how sometimes you just get so stressed and little things just seem
funny?
Yeah, well I couldn't believe it... he was a DWARF!!!
He stormed over to my car, looked up at me, and shouted, "I AM NOT HAPPY!"
So, I looked down at him and said, "Well, then which one are you?"
And then the fight started. | s**********8
发帖数: 25265 | 6 that disability one is hilarious
seconds
【在 l*********e 的大作中提到】
: 笑话来啦~~~~
: And Then The Fight Started
: My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flipping channels.
: She asked, "What's on TV?"
: I said, "Dust."
: And then the fight started.
: ======================================================================
: My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.
: She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds
: ."
| l*********e
发帖数: 5385 | 7 nod nod...
【在 s**********8 的大作中提到】
: that disability one is hilarious
:
: seconds
| s**********8
发帖数: 25265 | 8 where did u get this?
【在 l*********e 的大作中提到】
: nod nod...
| l*********e
发帖数: 5385 | 9 from my email box....several years ago.....
【在 s**********8 的大作中提到】
: where did u get this?
| s**********8
发帖数: 25265 | 10 oh. cool.
【在 l*********e 的大作中提到】
: from my email box....several years ago.....
| | | D**N
发帖数: 1440 | 11 那个矬子的也好玩儿. 我看过的还有一个你这儿缺了的....
I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order
first. 'I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please.' He said, 'Aren't
you worried about the mad cow?' 'Nah, she can order for herself.' And that's
how the fight started..... | b********i
发帖数: 761 | 12 INSTALLING A HUSBAND
Dear Tech Support,
Since upgraded Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 I noticed a distinct
slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and
jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0 .
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as
· Romance 9.5 and
· Personal Attention 6.5,
and then installed undesirable programs such as
· NBA 5.0 ,
· NFL 3.0 and
· Golf Clubs 4.1 .
Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the
system
· Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems
, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate. | b***k
发帖数: 2673 | 13 没太看懂，笑在何处啊？
and
【在 D**N 的大作中提到】
: 献给三八妇女节的小笑话
: A husband and wife are shopping in their local Wal-Mart.
: The husband picks up a case of Budweiser and puts it in their cart.
: "What do you think you're doing?" asks the wife.
: "They're on sale, only $10 for 24 cans." he replies.
: "Put them back, we can't afford them." demands the wife, and so they carry
: on shopping.
: A few aisles further on along the woman picks up a $20 jar of face cream and
: puts it in the basket.
: "What do you think you're doing?" asks the husband.
| d****a
发帖数: 3087 | 14
wife把husband击倒了。
【在 b***k 的大作中提到】
: 没太看懂，笑在何处啊？
:
: and
| b***k
发帖数: 2673 | 15 击倒？这么暴力？that's not fun either.
呵呵，总之，皇帝的内衣吧，既然大家都说这个是joke，且就joke吧。
【在 d****a 的大作中提到】
:
: wife把husband击倒了。
| D**N
发帖数: 1440 | 16 很认真嘛, 师弟.
【在 b***k 的大作中提到】
: 击倒？这么暴力？that's not fun either.
: 呵呵，总之，皇帝的内衣吧，既然大家都说这个是joke，且就joke吧。
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